Humm...came back from Spade 2 and now, my physical fatigue level is kinda high. Juz so tired now. Muscles aching everywhere and all I wanna do is to get away from army life a while. Next tuesday still got platoon fieldcamp and a 16km route march on friday, right after the fieldcamp. Wow, roxy. Juz hope that I get to book out on friday coz I've secured my IPPT gold and sat's suppose to be remedial training for IPPT.

A feeling in my heart is juz still stirring. Haha...I live in the past memories. Somewhat I juz seek encouragement, comfort and strength from all the past memories coz somewhat, there isn't really a strong source in the present to motivate me. Perhaps juz needed someone to be here. Juz hoping for someone to walk along with me and let me know that all that I'm doing is worth it. Yet, don't think I'll try and look for that someone coz I've already lost faith in love. If something that makes me so disheartened, depressed and discouraged so many a times, I don't really think that it should be something that I should continue seek for. Perhaps I juz need someone to come and change all these views of mine. Haha...but I juz know. I know that day won't come. I'll continue to live in the past and in my own fantasy world. =