When I suddenly have too much time at hand, the more I feel I'm wasting my life away.

Went AH to remove the stitch on my gum early in the morning and yet, it was fast as usual. So was hanging around the area until 10am when IKEA was opened. Bought a nice cloth for my shelf and a footstool for my armchair, my little cosy corner. Haha. Cool, my room is almost the way that I wanted to be when school starts. Now the thing is maintaining it. =P

Went JE Library and borrowed some books on sketching - human and landscape. Cool. Read different styles and types that I can follow to start sketching a person. Hmm...should put theory into action tml and the person will be non other than...my dream girl! Lol. Hope she is still my dream girl after I've drawn her. =O

Catching a glimspe of my inner self. Kinda like having the feeling of knowing this person for a long time but somewhat can't juz remember who he is, and bits and pieces about him juz stimulates that forgotten memory. Oh...sounds gay. Heh. Perhaps I've been me all along but a period of time when I changed to become somebody else, or tried to change to someone else to please the person, I've forgotten who I really am. Like teens or kids nowadays wearing matured clothes and putting on make-ups trying to pretend that they're adults, losing themselves in the process in pretence. Haha. Wondering if it's because I cannot express my emotions well or is it that internally, my emotions are flucuating so much that it's no point in showing? Like the turnover rate for negative emotions are so high that I can 'self-high' and get over -ve emotions with my own self entertaining skills but at the same time, the -ve feelings also returned quickly once the 'high' feeling dies down? Comes and goes, like some similar monthly cycle? =O Lol. Hah.

At least I'm slowly discovering.